


Yin and Yang

by ivebeenpossessedbysatan



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Accidental Cuddling, Alternate Universe - College/University, Author Is Sleep Deprived, Christmas Fluff, Don't be afraid, Explanations in Author's Note, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, M/M, Pre-Relationship, THERE WAS ONLY ONE BED, Totally-On-Purpose Cuddling, it's just a cute little Christmas thing, not in a bad way, only briefly though, seriously
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-26
Updated: 2020-12-26
Packaged: 2021-03-10 23:27:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,816
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28335399
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ivebeenpossessedbysatan/pseuds/ivebeenpossessedbysatan
Summary: Christmas was going to be awesome this year.
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester, Ellen Harvelle/Bobby Singer
Comments: 3
Kudos: 35
Collections: Destiel Writers & Readers





	Yin and Yang

**Author's Note:**

  * For [GatesKeeper](https://archiveofourown.org/users/GatesKeeper/gifts).



> So today was insane and I forgot to post this until just now.
> 
> Just a short little Christmas thing for GatesKeeper. I hope you enjoy, love. Sorry it's a little late.
> 
> Not betaed, all mistakes are mine. Feel free to point them out, but I'll edit this when it's not 2am. 
> 
> NOTE ON IMPLIED/REFERENCED CHILD ABUSE: Castiel didn't have a very good childhood and has scars from it. It's only mentioned once, and there are no details other than that it happened. In the same paragraph there is a reference to forcing children to fast (not allowing them to eat)
> 
> NOTE ON IMPLIED/REFERNCED DRUG USAGE: Dean remembers a time when he and Castiel got high and fell asleep on the couch together. That's it.

Christmas was going to be awesome this year.

Dean had finally convinced Castiel – his best friend and roommate - to come home with him this semester. After almost two years of leaving Cas behind in the dorm room during the holidays and feeling bad about it every time. Even if Castiel insisted that he was fine, that he didn’t care much for the holidays either way, and that he’d just be in the way if he came, Dean had finally managed to convince Castiel to come to his house this year. He was so excited to be able to show Castiel what Christmas with a real family was like.

Castiel hadn’t told him everything, of course, but he’d told him enough. Growing up in an extremely religious household, Christmas had not been about family for Cas. Christmas had been about God, and they had spent the day in worship, often without food, because God would have ‘wanted them to fast’. Fasting was all well and good for an adult, but forcing it on a child was borderline abuse, in Dean’s eyes.

Castiel hadn’t even blinked when he’d been describing it to Dean.

Castiel’s father was one of those television, evangelical preachers that lived in huge mansions paid for with donations to the church and drove six different fancy cars. Growing up, Castiel hadn’t known better. It wasn’t until he was in double digits before the cracks began to show. He began to question the legality of his father’s – and therefore the church’s - actions and had quickly and violently been shown what happened to people who questioned their way of life.

Castiel had a tattoo that covered up the scars from his insubordination. He’d shown it to Dean once, soon after they’d met. The first time Dean had invited him over for the holidays. He hadn’t even noticed the scars at first, due to the huge pair of black wings that dominated most of the skin. It was one of the most detailed tattoos that Dean had ever seen. He could see the attention that the artist had paid to making sure that every feather laid perfectly. Dean hadn’t been able to look away.

Castiel had given Dean permission to touch them, and it hadn’t been until his fingers had come into contact with the ink that he realized there were upraised lines crisscrossing all over his back. Most of them lined up with the feathers, probably on purpose, and unless someone knew about them, they wouldn’t be able to tell until they touched. Most people probably assumed they were scars where Castiel’s body had reacted badly to the ink and didn’t ask.

“I got them for two reasons.” Castiel had explained later, once his shirt was back on and they were passing a joint back and forth on the couch. “To cover up the scars and to symbolize me ‘spreading my wings’ when I finally left the church.”

They’d drank way too much that night and ended up falling asleep together on the couch. Dean had woken up with his head pillowed on Castiel’s thigh and Castiel’s head on his stomach, one arm thrown haphazardly around his waist.

Yeah, both of them had been a little sore from sleeping like that all night.

Castiel had teased him later that they’d been curled around each other like the yin/yang symbols, which had lead to a discussion and then a friendly argument about who was which one. Castiel insisted that Dean was the yang. He said everything about Dean was beautiful, and that he had the brightest soul of anyone he’d ever met. Dean had argued that just because Castiel had some horrible things happen to him in his past, that didn’t mean that he was yin. In the end, they’d agreed to disagree on the subject, though Dean was still certain that Castiel wasn’t the dark one between the two of them.

But ever since Castiel had told him that he’d never had a real Christmas, Dean had been trying to convince him to come to home with him for Christmas. Bobby and Ellen wouldn’t care, and Sam had heard enough about him that he was dying to meet him two. And this year he had finally succeeded in convincing him.

“Yo, Cas! You ready?” Dean called from the living room. Castiel had a last-minute seminar he’d had to attend so they were getting a late start. As it was, they wouldn’t be getting there until late tonight. Castiel appeared from his bedroom door, looking a little frazzled.

“How formal is your Christmas dinner? I have a suit I could bring. It needs to be pressed but – “

“Cas. You can wear what you normally wear, okay? Everyone is gonna be in flannel and blue jeans. Jo might put on lip stick if she’s feeling a little risqué.” He put his hands on Castiel’s shoulders, forcing him to meet his eyes. “It’s gonna be fine, Cas. They already like you.”

“No, they like how you perceive me to be. Your perception of me is vastly different from how I actually am.” Castiel said. “You see the best in people, Dean, and you always have. The version of me that you’ve built in your mind is the one that your family likes, they won’t actually like who I am…”

“Cas, stop, man. You’re freaking out for no reason.” Dean said. “It’s gonna be okay. We’re going to get there in a few hours, go to bed, then get up early to go and pick out the best Christmas tree we can get the best tree. Then we’ll go back to the house, decorate it, and then spend the rest of the night drinking and playing games. Then it’s Christmas Eve, and we’ll spend the day baking cookies and watching movies, then Christmas and we open presents and eat. Simple, painless and easy.” Dean said. Castiel took a breath and nodded.

“Right. No, I can do this.” He said, twisting his hands together.

“Exactly. We’ll show you how the Winchester’s do Christmas.” Dean slung an arm around his shoulders. “You ready to go?”

“Yes. My bag is packed. I just had a momentary freak out. I want to make a good impression.” He said.

“Cas, there’s no one to impress. You’ll be fine.” Dean assured him, squeezing his arm around him and then letting him go. “Let’s get on the road.”

“Okay.” Castiel stepped back into his room and came back with a duffle and his laptop bag slung over his shoulders. “I’m ready.” He smiled at Dean.

“Awesome. My shit is already in the Impala, we can head out.” Dean clapped a hand on his shoulder and then led him out the door, being sure the lock it behind them.

***

The ride from KU to Sioux Falls, South Dakota was somewhere around six hours, depending on how many stops Dean had to make. Luckily, Castiel was an excellent road trip companion. He didn’t complain about cramping up or how long it was taking, and handed Dean drinks and snacks without a single compliant, though he did draw the line at holding a bottle for Dean to pee in. (It had been a joke anyway, but Castiel’s reaction had made Dean smile.

“Dean you are a grown man, and It won’t take but a few minutes out of this trip for you to stop and use the bathroom. I refuse to hold a bottle for you to pee in while you’re driving. Not only is that incredibly unsafe, it’s also unsanitary.”

Dean had laughed about it and pulled over so that he could pee on the side of the road. Castiel took the time to do the same, and Dean couldn’t help but grin the for the next hour, finding it endlessly amusing. Castiel decided to withhold the beef jerky in retaliation for Dean’s laughter, but Dean thought it was worth it.

All in all it was a good ride, and they got in around eight pm, and by that time they were both exhausted with having been up since early this morning. Castiel was nervous, but the only reason that Dean could tell was because he knew him so well. Once he parked the Impala, he reached over and squeezed Castiel’s knee.

“Relax, Cas.” He said. “It’s gonna be fine. No one is going to expect us to be social after riding for six hours.” He waited until Castiel nodded at him and then got out of the Impala. Castiel followed him after a second, and Dean opened the trunk to get their bags out as the same time the door opened. He handed Castiel his bags and slung his own over his shoulder and slammed the trunk, already smiling as Ellen strode across the yard.

“It’s about time, kid! We thought you weren’t ever going to make it.” She said, throwing her arms around his neck.

“You know I always make it for you, Ellen.” He said, releasing her. Castiel was lingering in the background, just out of Dean’s peripheral vision, so Dean grabbed his arm and pulled him level with him. “Cas, this Ellen. She’s the woman that raised me into what I am today.”

“Don’t go blaming that on me, kid.” Ellen said, holding out her hand. “Hey, son, I’m Ellen.”

“Castiel.” Cas said, taking her hand. “But you can call me Cas.” Dean saw the surprise on Castiel’s face as Ellen used the grip to pull him into a hug. After a moment, Castiel even hugged her back.

“I know. I’ve heard a lot about you. You’re all this numbskull talks about.” Ellen teased, releasing him.

“Good things, I hope?” Castiel said, glancing at Dean. “If not, I want you to know that Dean has a tendency to exaggerate that he definitely didn’t get from you.”

Ellen laughed. “You’ll fit in just fine, Cas.” She said. “Now ya’ll come on inside, it’s too cold to be standing out her shooting the shit.” Dean hefted his bag once more and gestured for Castiel to go first, and they followed Ellen into the house.

Sam, Bobby and Jo were all sitting on the couch, watching one of the old Claymation Christmas movies on the ancient television set. When the door shut, they all turned and looked at them. Dean felt Castiel freeze and put a reassuring hand on the small of his back.

“Well, since you are all too rude to stand up and introduce yourself properly, I guess I’ll do it.”

“Hey, I’m an old man, son. My joints can’t take jumping up and down anymore.” Bobby interrupted, and Dean cheerfully ignored him to make introductions.

“Cas, this Bobby, Sam and Jo. Sam’s adopted, but don’t bring it up. He’s really sensitive about it.”

“Screw you, Jerk.” Sam said, finally standing up and coming over to them. “I’m not really adopted. Dean’s just a dickhead.” He shook his head. “I’m Sam. Dean’s told me a lot about you.” He held out his hand and Castiel took it with a gentle smile.

“Likewise. I feel like I know you already.” They both glanced at Dean and he gave them a thumbs up and a smile.

“Well, Dean told me about you, but he never did tell me that you were hot.” Jo said, coming up and elbowing Sam out of the way. “I’m Jo. It’s short for Joanna, but if you ever call me that I’ll castrate you.” She looked at him seriously for a moment and then smiled. “I’m the unofficial little sister.”

“Unofficial, my ass. No one besides family could get on my nerves as bad as you do.” Dean rolled his eyes and leaned closer to Castiel. “She’s serious. You should see her knife collection.” Dean stage whispered, mostly to watch Castiel’s expression. His eyes only widened for a second before he was also shaking her hand.

“I’ll keep that in mind. It’s good to meet you, Jo.” She winked and then turned back to T.V., elbowing Sam out of the way so that she could reclaim her seat.

That just left Bobby, and for some reason, Dean was the most nervous about him. He wanted Bobby to like Castiel. Dean watched with trepidation as Bobby heaved himself out of the chair as Castiel approached him.

“All these other idjits have already said your name, so I’m not gonna make you repeat it. I’m Bobby. Welcome to the Singer-Harvelle household, son.” Castiel shook his hand and smiled. “Thank you, Mr. Singer, it’s an honor – “

“Mr. Singer was my father, boy, you call me Bobby.” He interrupted.

“Yes, sir. Thank you for letting me gate-crash your Christmas, Bobby. I promise I’ll do my best to help with everything.”

“The only thing we’re gonna need your help with is that damn tree tomorrow. That’s why I keep you young’uns around so my old bones don’t have to do that anymore.” He clapped him on the shoulder and then sat back down. Now that the introductions were over, Dean walked up to Castiel. “Come on, I’ll show you my room.” He said, nudging Castiel towards the stairs. “We’ve been on the road for a while, we’ll probably just go to bed. Goodnight, everyone.” There was a chorus of ‘goodnights!’ thrown back at the two of them as they climbed the stairs.

"Sorry, there's not an extra bed with both Jo and Sam home. You can have mine, though - I'm good with the air mattress." Dean said, even if he knew that it would wreck his back. He wasn’t going to make Castiel sleep in the floor.

"Or we could share." Castiel suggested, stepping into the room just as Dean turned the light on. Dean almost swallowed his tongue.

"Share?" He asked, not quite understanding through the shock of the suggestion.

"Yes, Dean, share." Castiel said, his blue eyes dancing with amusement. "Surely you're familiar with the concept? I know you made it past first grade."

Dean shook his head to clear it. “I am! I just..."

"Just what? It's not like we've never done it before." Castiel reminded him. "How else would I know that you become an octopus if there's another person within three feet of you while you're asleep?" Dean blushed and rolled his eyes.

"Fine, but you won't be complaining about my octopus tendencies in the morning. This house is drafty."

"It's also full of love." Castiel's voice was sincere as he placed his bag gently on the dresser and started to pull off his clothes, undoubtedly changing the ones he'd had on since late last night. “Which is something I’m not sure I’ve experienced before. It’s certainly different.”

Dean didn't know what to say to that, so he took his duffle and put it on the bed, but not before sneaking a glance at the gorgeous tattoo that adorned Castiel's body. He wanted to look longer, but that was creepy and Castiel was pulling on a loose t-shirt and changing into plaid pajama bottoms, so Dean turned away to change into his own pajamas.

They were both silent as they climbed into the bed, with Castiel by the wall and Dean on the other side out of habit. Castiel was right, there had been many nights after the first time they’d woken up next to each other, mostly in beds or on couches, though they had been on the floor a time or two, and once, after a memorable party at Ash’s, on a pool table.

That had been a good night. The only thing he vaguely remember was taking a body shot off of Cas, but he pushed that thought away with a smile and settle down into the bed. He was surprised when Castiel immediately scooted closer and tucked into his chest. At Dean raised eyebrow, Castiel huffed.

“We’re going to end up here anyway and you’re cold.” Castiel said, grabbing Dean’s arm and putting it over his waist as he made himself comfortable on Dean’s chest. After another seconds hesitation, Dean tightened his hold on him and indulged himself in burying his head in Castiel’s hair to breathe him in. Castiel made a pleased noise and settled in, and within moments Dean felt his breath even out.

Maybe this was a bad idea. Despite them doing this very thing several times when they were drinking, they were sober now and it felt different, being in his childhood bedroom as opposed to their shared apartment. But he couldn’t deny that it felt good. It felt almost…right. At least to Dean. And while he couldn’t exactly ask Castiel, he was willing to bet he wasn’t the only one feeling that way. Like at the end of the day, he was supposed to be her with Castiel. Like yin and yang, always together and always holding a piece of the other.

 _Yeah._ Dean thought. _This Christmas was going to be awesome._

**Author's Note:**

> I have the groundwork laid for another chapter, but I'm also a flake so don't hold me to it.
> 
> Comments and Kudos give me heaps of undeserved validation.
> 
> Thanks for reading!


End file.
